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1 for Paula Deen.
2 for Marilyn Monroe’s underpants.
3 for Morrigan Aria.
4 for eavesdropping.
5 for clothing swaps.
6 for new sheets.
7 for homemade beauty treatments.
8 for Google searches.
9 for new medicines.
10 for dating advice.
11 for the best news of 2010.
12 I can cook -- if I have to.
13 I don’t need energy drinks.
14 I’ve learned my lesson.
15 for new rating systems.
16 for technological advancements.
17 for Betty.
18 for Bootie Pop.
19 for More cupcakes.
20 for Girl Scouts.

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I’m one of those annoying people who wakes up happy every day. I'm grateful for the simple things in life. (Not butterfly kisses and unicorns, but Spanx, dirty martinis and pretty much anything covered in chocolate or cheese.) I'm anonymous because HR departments completely overreact when I say benign stuff like, my boss sucks donkey dicks. And basically, I need a job because booze doesn’t grow on trees.
sign up for cocktails

(why not, it's free)

Get tasty cocktail recipes, girlie tips
and if I'm not too hung over, I'll send
out occasional members only emails
to show my gratitude.

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(I'd never give out your name to a
guy in a bar or sell your email address)
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