Call me an old fashioned gal, but I want the guy to be dominant in the sack. I feel totally comfortable making this confession because I know there are other girls out there who feel the same way, that and -- I’m anonymous.

I have a re-occurring sexual fantasy where this guy completely dominates me and makes me do whatever he wants. He’s not a cop, a mafia don or green beret, oh no, he’s someone mucho mas macho. I have sexual fantasies about Cesar Millan, the Dog Whisperer. Here’s how it goes down, we’re having sex -- doggie style of course, and just when I’m about to tell him “don’t stop!” he corrects me with a strict, “No touch, no talk, no eye contact” and then he makes that “Tssssssttttt” sound and pokes me in my butt cheek. And then, as Rachel Zoe would say “I. Die.”

I found a study published in a serious sounding magazine that seems to validate my embarrassing sexual predilection. New Scientist magazine says couples who spank and tie each other up feel closer to each other afterward. They don’t mention the “Tssssssttttt” thing Cesar does to me, but I’m thinking it’s all related. It goes on to say couples who enjoy S&M had increased levels of stress hormones, but after the experience of flogging, whipping, biting and bondage was over, they felt their relationship was stronger. Okay, wait. That’s not what I’m talking about at all. If Cesar tries to flog me, all bets are off. He’s never seen such a rabid bitch, not even Taylor on the Rachel Zoe Project. Why do I keep bringing up that show? It has nothing to do with this topic.

There’s something comforting and sexy about a man who takes the control in the middle of a tumble. I’m grateful for dominant men because it’s all about biology. Women are hard-wired with the desire to be chased by men, and then, if we want, we slow down just enough to get caught. When the woman is the dominant one, it doesn’t work, because she emasculates the guy and turns him into a weak, unattractive boy just begging to have sand kicked into his face -- just ask Rodger, Rachel Zoe’s husband.

That’s why I’m grateful for dominant men.