When my friend Kristen sends a package to my office, I never, ever, never open it until I get home. In the past she’s sent me an inflatable sheep (with strategically placed openings for my animal pleasures), a gallon of KY with a convenient pump and today -- most embarrassing of all, the boyfriend pillow.

The manufacturers describe my Boyfriend Pillow as “a soft body pillow that resembles the torso of a big strong man with a comforting arm that cuddles you. It is made of memory foam designed to pad the natural contours of your body for even more comfort. It comes with a removable microfiber shirt for softness and easy care.” Why my boyfriend pillow is wearing a button down dress shirt to bed is a mystery to me, but he obviously has a white collar job -- which is more than I can say for the rest of my pillows who are unemployed and lay around in bed all day.

At least the boyfriend pillow is made out of memory foam, which means unlike my other boyfriends, he should remember my birthday. I’m grateful for the Boyfriend Pillow because as mortifying as it was to receive, it gave me an idea for the perfect gift to send to Kristen at her office. The girlfriend pillow.

That’s why I’m grateful for the Boyfriend Pillow.